Adams Basket Case Theory
I also find it helpful to remind myself that every human is a mess on the inside. It’s easy to assume the good-looking and well-spoken person in front of you has it all together and is therefore your superior. The reality is that everyone is a basket case on the inside. Some people just hide it better.
Scott Adams, How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big
You are a mess.
You spend a lot of energy trying to hide that, but the truth leaks out eventually.
You compare your life with the life your “friends” post on Facebook and Instagram.
You compare the way you look when you step out of the shower with the way they look all dressed up with a flattering filter applied.
You compare the scattered thoughts floating around in your head with their carefully composed post about their latest visit to a fancy restaurant.
And so, you conclude that you are the only one struggling.
But everyone struggles.
The ones who don’t appear to be struggling are often the ones who struggle the most.
Don’t try to hide the struggle.
The struggle is a sign that you are growing.
There is a bonus: when you stop trying to convince yourself and everyone else that you have it all together, it is at that moment you appear to be confident and mostly together.
When you do slip up (and you will) others often won’t notice because they are too busy managing their own inner chaos.
But some will notice and point out your mistake.
Your best move is to own the mistake.
Resist the temptation to defend yourself and to make excuses.
People who own their mistakes appear supremely confident.
Learn what you can from your critics.
But don’t let them pitch a tent in your head.
Stop trying to win the approval of those who are impossible to please.
Don’t be one of those people yourself — especially with yourself.
Celebrate the struggles that you have turned into wins.
See your current struggles as opportunities.
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